Thoughts for Today

As an early childhood educator who specializes in working with children with mild to severe disabilities I am very familiar with a poem called “Welcome to Holland” by Emily Perl Kingsley, written in 1987 http://www.our-kids.org/Archives/Holland.html . The poem synopsizes a parent’s reality about having a child with a disability and compares it to taking a trip you planned and organized but instead of getting where you planned, you end up in another foreign country that is far different than the place you wanted to go. I have given this poem to several of the parents I work with and it often brings some perspective and some comfort to those that perhaps can’t articulate their feelings.

When I read that poem, and I highly encourage you to do so if you haven’t already, I think it has been written for parents of children with more severe disabilities than the ones my child is experiencing. I read it and I do relate to it to a point, but because my son’s challenges do not compare to those on the more globally delayed end, it just doesn’t exactly fit. I don’t feel like I am in Holland, the destination is not that drastically different, but I do feel like the trip I planned to take has taken a detour. This detour has taken me on a road that is bumpier and definitely more uphill than the route I had planned. I don’t have a GPS to navigate with and the map I am trying to read is out of date. They have added some new roads and towns since this map was written, making it even less familiar than the way I remember it from when I was a child. We have already met adversity – its name is epilepsy – who has delayed our travels, but did not prevent us from forging ahead.

My heart tells me I know we will finally get to our destination – the one I planned for us (or hopefully very close)– but I have no idea how long it will take us to get there, or whether I will have enough gas or even enough money along the way to sustain us if special supplies are needed. I can only hope those we meet will be friendly (much like those we have already met) and that I have packed enough perseverance, patience and humor to get us there. After all, I am the one driving this vehicle and one wrong turn might make our trip that much longer. Regardless this driver (and many more like her) has the responsibility to drive in all kinds of weather. Today the weatherman calls for fear, tomorrow determination, optimism or deep sadness or anger. Thank goodness I have my emergency kit – the love and support of friends and family, some hugs and kind words of encouragement to keep me going. It will be a long ride but we will get there – oh no watch out, there is a little bump ahead. Hold on tight!